Anxious attachment style

If you have an anxious attachment style, it means that you find it difficult to trust new people or get comfortable in new relationships. You may worry that your partner doesn't completely love and accept you or worry about your partner leaving you for someone else. Your emotions are also intense and hard to control - especially when you feel threatened. To manage these worries, some people turn to unhealthy behaviors such as hoarding items that remind them of their loved one or drinking too much alcohol. Alternatively, they might avoid closeness with others altogether, which can make the problem worse over time by making them feel more isolated and lonely than ever before.

Anxious attachment occurs when your beliefs about relationships fall into one of two categories: the need for the relationship to be secure and to feel loved, or the fear of being abandoned by your partner. The driving force behind an anxious attachment style is deep-rooted belief that your partner will not meet your needs for love and security. This issue can cause you to act out in unhealthy ways when you're with a new partner or in a new relationship.

Anxious attachment is associated with the avoidant style of coping with distress: instead of talking about their emotions and problems, people who have an anxious attachment style often keep quiet and try to deal with them alone. Some people with an anxious attachment style feel a need to monitor their partner's behaviors and activities. They may try to control their partner's communications and relationships. Instead of coping by talking about their feelings, they may cope by focusing on the problems of their relationship or the negative aspects of their partner's character.

People who have an anxious attachment style often feel disconnected in the relationship, although they'll often blame this disconnection on their partner rather than on themselves. In contrast, people with a dismissive attachment style try to put up walls between themselves and others, which makes it hard to form close bonds in the first place.

Some people who have an anxious attachment style feel terrified that their partner will leave them. These people have a lot of fear and anxiety about abandonment, which can be triggered by their partner's negative behavior or even the fear that the relationship might end. If you have an anxious attachment style, it is important to recognize that you are not responsible for your partner's behavior. Your partner may threaten to leave, but they may not actually do so.

In contrast to the dismissive and avoidant styles of coping with distress, anxious attachment involves excessive or unrealistic focus on how the relationship is going - whether you feel loved and accepted or if your partner is actually planning on leaving you.